The Fosters: Who needs labels?

ABC Family/Adam Taylor
ABC Family/Adam Taylor

To tell or not to tell? That’s the question facing Lena on The Fosters as things got really awkward with her whole Monte situation in this week’s “Déja Vu.” She’s been able to sweep the fact that Monte kissed her awhile back under the rug by telling herself that Monte’s straight and it was a one time thing, but when she finds out Monte’s now dating women all of that logic goes straight out the window. Because you see, if Monte is exploring her sexuality then that kiss may have really meant something, and if that’s the case then not telling Stef would be a betrayal.

Can I just go on record right now and say that yes Lena, you should most definitely tell Stef? Gay, straight or bisexual, it doesn’t matter how Monte labels herself, the truth will most definitely come out and when it does Stef’s not going to care how Monte identifies herself sexually. She’s going to see that you kept this from her, and whether or not the kiss actually meant anything, the fact that you hid it speaks volumes. It’s always better to tell the truth, haven’t we all learned this over years of watching TV? Make no mistake, this truth will come out and it won’t be good when it does.

However, if Lena would’ve came out straight away and told Stef that Monte kissed her, sure Stef would’ve been upset, and at first may have even had some issue with the two women continuing to work together. But I’m guessing that she would’ve gotten over it, realized Lena was being honest with her and that Lena was still fully committed to their marriage and life would’ve moved on. Now I feel as though it’s just a ticking time bomb, sitting out there waiting to cause trouble in their marriage. Let’s just hope when it does go off, the side effects are as minimal as possible.

As much as this whole storyline with Monte stresses me out because of the possible damage it could do to Stef and Lena’s relationship, I really love that The Fosters is exploring why people feel the need to put a label on someone’s sexuality. We are seeing it here with Monte and her situation, but also saw it earlier in the season with Jude and Connor. Monte is clearly just trying to figure things out and yes, she may have thought of herself as a straight woman, having been married before, but there have been a lot of changes in her life as of late that have left her questioning that. As was pointed out multiple times last night, being previously married to a man doesn’t mean that one is straight.

ABC Family/Adam Taylor
ABC Family/Adam Taylor

Personally, I think labels are unnecessary when it comes to one’s sexuality. Isn’t it all about the person and finding someone you can connect with? If that happens to be a man, then OK. If it’s a woman, well then OK to that as well. Why must we label it? Love knows nothing of labels, so why do we spend so much time as a society caught up on them? I love the fact that The Fosters is once again leading the way on a conversation that is very important to have, especially with the many young minds that watch the show on a weekly basis. So while I don’t love the drama that Monte is bringing into Stef and Lena’s marriage, I do love the conversations and debates that the idea of having to label whether or not Monte is “gay, straight or bisexual” brings up.

Stories and topics such as these are why The Fosters is such an important show and one of the many reasons why I’m glad to have it on the air today.

Elsewhere in Fosters-land

  • I’m really enjoying Mike with AJ. I just worry about AJ hurting him which would totally crush him at this point.
  • I get that Brandon is supposedly worried about the same thing, but I’m not buying it. I think Brandon is just jealous. It almost feels like the show is actively trying to make me hate Brandon each week.
  • Jonner has overcome homophobic dads and now the aftermath of their shooting. Can we just let them be happy for a little bit?
  • Who has a churronut? I’m going to need to try one of those ASAP!
  • “You can’t date women who watched Friends for the first time on Netflix.” – Amen! Lines like this are also why I love this show.
  • I loved Callie ambushing Mariana into helping her with her school project. It was totally something Mariana would do and nice to see her get some of her own medicine.
  • Speaking of Callie, did anyone else think Maia Mitchell was totally channeling Joey Potter this week in honor of Dawson’s Creek coming to ABC Family?

Should Lena come clean? What’s your take on labels? Sound off in the comments below!

The Fosters airs Mondays at 8 p.m. ET on ABC Family and ABC Spark.

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